Is it Real Love or Fake Love? (10 Tips to help you decide)

Ohhhhh Valentine’s Day.

The day we give and receive love by way of cute heart-shaped cards,  delectable rich chocolates, and such.  We embrace the idea of showering our loved ones with treats to say ‘ I love you’.

However, even on a day like today, when it should be all about real love,  there are those who will smile in your face, and the whole time they wanna take your place- showering you with fake love.  (Pardon the Drake reference).  I find that these days, it’s getting harder and harder to differentiate between the real and the fake love.  I guess that means the fake people have gotten really good at their jobs. People will literally, smile in your face- out one side of their mouth, and talk about you in your face- out the other side of their mouth; all at the same time.  It’s just the times we live in.

Here are some tips to help you read between the blurry  lines of real love and fake love:

  • You see it in their eyes:

The saying goes:  the eyes don’t lie. That is so very true.  When someone truly detests you, their eyes often shift and rarely make direct eye contact. If they do make eye contact, you can see the judgmental snare reflected in their eyes. Look closely, the eyes will tell you all you need to know.

  • You hear the fake love in  their tone:

Voice fluctuation is a tell-tell sign to determine how someone really feels about you. As humans, when someone excites us or makes us happy, our vocal cords will rise and fall in pitch, as we interact with that person. However, usually when someone is not that into you, they are very monotone in speech. It’s  almost seems like it is taking everything in them to have a conversation with you; and that’s probably because it is.

  • You feel the fake love  in their energy:

How someone makes you feel is key. If someone is genuine and means you well, their energy will uplift you. However, if you feel drained and heavy around that person,  that’s a sign for caution. Go with your energy always.

  • Body Language:

When speaking with someone who you think may be showing you fake love, look at their body language. Are their arms closed off? Do they keep a healthy distance? Are they shifted away from you? If any of this rings true, there is a good chance that person is not being genuinely engaging. Keep a watchful eye on them.

  • You enter the room, and everyone becomes quiet:

You know that awkward feeling; you enter a room and it all of a sudden becomes eerily quiet. You know instinctively that everyone in that room was just talking about you. But as soon as you walk in, they all smile in your face. If they can’t say it to your face, the love is fake. Period.

  • Everything seems forced, and not genuine:

This goes back to energy. If someone can’t be genuine in how they interact with you, or in the way they show you love, the love is fake.

  • They never congratulate you:

Haters, never want to see you grow. They never really want to see you advance in life. And they have a hard time hiding it. Chances are the mere reason someone who is showing you fake love, remains in your life, is to see you stumble. When you fly, instead of fall, it eats them alive, and they can’t bring themselves to offer a kind or encouraging word. So pay attention to who applauds when you win, and who remains mute.

  • They throw passive aggressive jabs:

The phonies, make underhanded comments with a smile and in a play-play tone, to water it down; however make no mistake, they are giving you a glimpse into how  they really feel.

  • People who really love you, are weary of them:

Your tried and true loved ones tend to see in others what we won’t allow ourselves to see. They can see that someone has ill motives and intentions. If you have two friends that butt heads, it’s usually because your ride or die friend or family member can see that fake love clearly, in the other friend. Maybe it’s time you open up your eyes also.

Keep in mind most often when people show fake love, is because they wanna take your place. Or put more eloquently, they envy you because they see something in you, they lack in themselves. Understanding this, perhaps means there is reason to be sympathetic to those who suffer from this lack of being genuine and real. Just keep in mind, while they’re hating or spreading that fake love- it’s them, not you! The best thing you can do is continue to move graciously through life, and lead by example by spreading real authentic genuine love.



Do You Dry Skin Brush?

Do you love your skin?

If you do, then you should be dry skin brushing, if you’re not already. What is dry skin brushing, you ask?

From what I have discovered since learning of dry skin brushing;  it’s the best thing one can do for their skin, right next to drinking heaps of water:

Dry skin brushing, literally means to take a bristle brush (preferably with a long handle to access all over the body) and brush the skin, in short strokes towards the heart. Keep in mind that the skin is the human bodies largest organ. Dry brushing the skin removes dead skin, and provides a deep exfoliation that cleanses the pores in an amazing way. Aside from revealing a new supple layer of skin, dry brushing also, helps the lymphatic system operate to it’s maximum capability.

The lymphatic system is a network of tissues and organs that help rid the body of toxins, waste and other unwanted materials. The primary function of the lymphatic system is to transport lymph, a fluid containing infection-fighting white blood cells, throughout the body. – – Living Science

Keeping the lymphatic system draining properly is important because it aides in provided the cells necessary to fight diseases.  If you’re like me, you probably struggle with understanding how a bristle brush, applied to our outer layer of skin, affects our lymph system.  Well, the key is to brush towards the heart, which provides circulation of blood cells to the heart and the thymus.  To truly access our lymphatic system with the dry brush method, we must brush aggressively,  and again ,towards the heart.

Dry Skin Brush x Healthy Urban Girl

To truly see, and feel the results of dry skin brushing, like many other good habits, consistency is key.  Try dry skin brushing daily before showering. After showering be sure to follow up with a natural fruit oil, like organic unrefined coconut oil, applied to your new skin.  This will allow for maximum results of soft supple skin. Also, since the pores are unclogged and very open, it’s important to keep in mind the chemicals we are allowing to seep into our bloodstream, so try and keep it as natural as possible.

Grab a brush like this one (click the picture for easy purchase, cost under $20)

and give dry brushing a go. After a few weeks drop me a note, and let me know if you’re loving your new supple soft skin.